Since Johann has special needs, his teachers welcome the idea that Yaya is just outside. At first I have apprehensions because what if they become too dependent on her in handling Johann inside the classroom? Up to now, I’m still weighing things out. But, if there’s one thing I like about Yaya staying in school with Johann is that I get first hand information on what transpired during Johann’s day.

Normally, there’d be homework. It is easy if there is, because I see what they were doing during the lessons. But on some days, there aren’t any. That’s when I wonder what did Johann learn for the day. And that’s where Yaya comes in. She reports to me who he played with, what he did, what he didn’t do, etc. etc. She was also the one who reported the girl who liked my son. Eeek.

So, I’m not closing my doors yet. I know Johann needs to be independent, and his teachers need to be too. But how can I monitor his activities if I don’t have my eyes and ears? The decision to stay or go home will have its pros and cons, it’s just a matter of weighing them in.

Last summer as we were preparing Johann for schooling we took the chance to fully potty train him as well. We were going through our days that he didn’t wear diapers when at home and we were doing well, it was time to move on.

As with anything new, it was a bit overwhelming, but we have a good team. Here are the steps we took to ensure that Johann will have a smooth transition from diapers to underwear, and that we adults won’t be too stressed with the change.

Get the buy in of his caregivers

Admittedly I am not the one who stays with him the whole day as I work full time. We are blessed with a very reliable yaya and Lola who’s there most of the time. We got their approval first, that they will support us of our plan since they will be the one to reinforce it.

Take it one step at a time

Getting Johann on full no-diapers-mode was a huge leap for us, what more for the boy. So we outlined steps on how he can move on to it. Since he started not wearing diapers when at home during the day, we shifted to doing the following:

1. No diapers even when outside, during the day
2. No diapers even when in school, during the day
3. No diapers at home, during the night
4. No diapers, during the night, then wake him up for potty breaks
5. No diapers, during the night, then wait for him to ask to go to the CR
6. No diapers, all the time

Explain Things to Johann

It wasn’t easy making him grasp the concept of the toilet, peeing, and pooping without his diapers. He needed to feel the urge to pee or poop himself and that’s something we usually stress for. Like, when he says “poopoop” we’d go scrambling around as if he’d go anytime. He gets scared. But later on, he got used to it, that he even go to the CR himself.

What’s the difference?

Johann used to sit on the toilet even when just peeing. We had to set an example. That means his Dad, his Lolo, even me and Yaya explains that he should pee standing up. It took a while before he did, but now we are proud to say that he can do it, even by himself! Ahh, such an accomplishment!

So now, Johann is fully potty trained, good bye diapers! Hello savings! Or until his little sister arrives.

First we had to address his attention span. Johann’s been doing OT for some time now, and he has improved a lot. He acknowledges the authority of his therapists, but when it is Mom (or Dad) he thinks its play time. So far, we tried rewarding him for doing his homework slowly, but we are running out of rewards, aside from we don’t him to associate doing homework with a bargain. We need to find a work around.

Next is his conceptualization skills. We are still delayed by a year and a big chunk of that come from his apprehension of concepts. We really need to play and make things interesting for him so he will do the work. I realized that it is difficult to make things fun if we have a goal to finish. We also need his speech to improve, so aside from the actual concepts assigned for the day, we want him to repeat the pronunciation and correct tone of the concept. Lots of work!

Last is our time. We get out of the office late already, when we arrive at home, Johann should have been fed and bathed ready to go to sleep. We’re working on getting home earlier, pray for us. I can’t help but think if I am full time at home, would things be different. Only God knows. I am really grateful though that Yaya can handle Johann and that Lola is around 2 out of 5 days so Johann can have guidance aside from Mom and Dad. But we really need to do something about our time. Soon, Johann. Soon.

I guess homework is not just a way of pruning Johann to develop his skills, but also us as parents. As I’ve come to realize, Johann’s been teaching me far greater things when I assist him with homework. I learn the most important things like patience, creativity, and endurance with every assignment.

Pretend play is one of the best ever activity Johann has. His imagination is so vivid and his interest in whatever he is pretending to be is fascinating. I don’t remember myself as imaginative as Johann is now. Must be from his Dad then. But I am amazed at how cute he is. Yes, proud mommy here.

One of the avenues we present him to get new ideas from is (don’t laugh!) through the different movies he watches. Of course we screen the kind of movies he indulges in, and I’m relieved that he like Moses and Joseph. He used to just watch Moses, which is why he has his own staff. But lately he is keen on pretending to be Joseph, King of Dreams.

His Dad bought the staff so Johann can pretend to be Moses. And his Dad also wanted him to have a coat like Joseph’s. Of course Mommy said ‘no’. Unless he uses it for Halloween, why not, but where will we get one? Daddy can’t be beat! He reached into our closet, got one of his polos and put it on Johann. The first one was too long, so he got another one. It was perfect.

Johann got the idea and starts to dance, sing, and twirl around like Joseph. It is really amazing how contented he is doing just that. If only all movies encourages this kind of stimulation. Mommy’s happy too, since we didn’t need to buy an actual multi colored coat ala Joseph.

Johann has one of the sweetest Ninangs in the world. My sister is on the other quarter of the world, in the Middle East, but you can’t stop her from showering her affection towards Johann. For the past few months she was accumulating ‘stuff’ to be put in a balikbayan box to be shipped over to us here in the Philippines.

Of course, Johann has the most number of loot! She sent over a couple of puzzles knowing that Johann was developing a knack for solving puzzles, fast. Mickey made it to the list since when Johann was a newborn, he used to suck on Mickey’s nose. She also sent over a hooded towel because Johann loves to swim and an ordinary towel is too easy for him to remove, we needed Johann to be warm when he goes out of a pool.

The best part – because Johann was starting preschool, she sent him mini-Oreos for his snack! My Johann has been eating Oreo’s for the past month already teehee… We also make him drink the juice, with a special Raspberry and other Berries flavor.

Thanks so much Ninang Eljay! Gianna is also waiting for her stuff soon!

At the start of the year we got a big blessing, albeit a big surprise. Johann is going to be a big brother! Yes, he’s gonna have a little brother or sister soon. What big changes for this year right? When the excitement finally died down (after three months haha) we got down to business.

Johann was going to go through a lot of changes, one, he’s going to school. Two, he’s going to be Kuya! These are big adjustments for my little boy. We are also clueless on how to parent two children, but we decided to focus on Johann first.

We got him a book from Amazon entitled “I’m a Big Brother.” It was highly recommended in one of the mommy forums I frequent and when I wasn’t able to find it in any of the major bookstores, I resorted to getting it online. We recently got it and started introducing it to Johann.

Before it arrived, we knew Johann’s going to have a little sister. We explained to him that Mommy’s tummy is delicate so he won’t be too rough with me. That he has a little sister inside named Gianna. He calls my tummy “Gia” and kisses, touches it often. It was challenging explaining the concepts, but we’ll get through. That was our premise for getting the book, Johann loves books.

We showed him the pictures of the big brother and baby inside the book, associating them to him and Gia. So far, he still has to grasp the concept, but we’re getting there. The book has a lot of good suggestions on what else we need to do, aside from the story for the little boy himself. Really a good buy. What we need to do next is to bring Johann to see an actual baby. Good thing we have a few friends who gave birth ahead of us, we have a couple of schedules set already!

She let me borrow one of their books. The plan was to read the book and use my voice as props. They have a sound system, so I borrowed it. I asked the children if they know what the volume knob is for. If you turn the knob to the right, the sound becomes loud. If you turn the knob left, the sound becomes soft. LOUUUUUD and sooofffft. That was the big idea.

I started to read the story in my normal voice. I had a volunteer turn the knob to the right, and I literally had to deepen and project my voice so they can recognize the LOUD sound. I think they got it as they were covering their ears. Then one kid turned the knob to the left and I read in a soft, almost quiet voice. They said “louder” so obviously they can’t hear me then. I jumped at the opportunity to explain that’s how Johann hears sounds. He can’t hear the normal voices we have, it comes to him softly, so he needs his hearing aids for him to hear properly. And, they can’t shout at him because it will hurt him more. And then I froze. They asked me what happened to Johann and why he is like that. Oh honey, if I knew, I would tell you, but I also don’t know, but I trust that it is for his best.

Teacher Diane took over as if on cue. She reiterated what they have learned and asked the kids questions. Successful in diverting from the topic, the kids eagerly listened as we finished the story. Then each kid lined up to get their turn to turn the knob! I think I just thought them how to play with the sound system. Oh noes…

I was happy though. I felt a sense of fulfillment. As if I won it for Johann. I hope the kids will remember that lesson, and as they grow older, they keep it in mind. So far, everyone’s friends with each other. And I know my Johann is enjoying. I thank God for Teacher Diane’s help. And she promised to unplug the sound system so the kids can’t play with it.

Now, on to more complicated things like homework!

It went on like this:

Dear Parents,

My name is Maia Nuguid, I am the mother of one your child’s classmates, Johann. He is a new student at the Pebbles and Bammbamm Learning Center. I am writing to you to ask for your help.

Johann is currently enrolled in Teacher Luz’s nursery class. He is an energetic and vibrant preschooler. Your child might ask you what those weird looking things in his ears are. I hope you can help them understand that Johann wears hearing aids.

… to introduce this stage mother and her son who wears a hearing aid in school, at home, in all places, at all waking hours…

Johann is hard of hearing. At seven months, we put him on hearing aids after confirming that he has moderate hearing loss on both his ears. He is not deaf; he hears sounds, but only faintly. He wears his hearing aids to help him amplify these sounds so he may learn to listen intently and be able to speak clearly. He has a very high chance of living a normal life like us and that is why he is with normal hearing kids. If Johann has anything alarming, it is his speech delay only.

Please don’t be afraid. Johann’s condition is not contagious. He didn’t get sick when he was born, nor did I when I was pregnant with him. We believe he just has a special mission. What that mission is, only time will tell.

… to give more information on the myth that hard of hearing is the same as deafness, or being hearing impaired is contagious…

As much as I want to do everything for him, I admit I need your help. Since our children interact every day, I hope you can help your children comprehend that Johann is also just a normal kid like them. Here are a few things you can teach them so they know how to cope with Johann around:

• Always speak in a clear voice and moderate tone.
• Come closer to the person you are talking to. Avoid shouting.
• Repeat your sentences if the person doesn’t seem to understand the first time.
• Tap the person’s shoulders gently if he or she doesn’t seem to notice you while you are talking.

… to ask them to find it in their hearts to help us help Johann and how all of us can help Johann in our own little ways…

I understand that it is complicated for children to understand this easily, so I pray that you consider our plea for help. I know this is a big favor, and I thank you for your effort. I thank you for making Johann’s world better, no matter how you choose to do it. I believe you are a blessing to our lives, and we look forward to meeting you in person soon.

… but still in their own choice or venue.

Of course I gave them my contact information so they can ask me for clarifications. Thank God for Teacher Luz and Diane for helping me in this endeavor. I pray that these parents will do help us in any way.

I also thought it is the perfect time to restart his blog! We’ve never been good at being consistent in documenting his progress, so with this new beginning, we are riding on the wave and taking advantage of it. I pray that we are able to keep it up though.

So far, in the one week Johann is going every day to class, we observed his social skills. We took summer classes but they are just few in the class, so now he is in a bigger class with more kids. He is usually very jolly, but he still doesn’t communicate very well peer to peer. Not to worry though, it’s just the first week. Our biggest challenge now is how to coordinate and collaborate with his Nursery teacher, his occupational therapist, and his speech therapist. We have a common notebook and we’ll see how it goes but our secret is – tadaaaaaan – recording Johann in a video!

Each week, we’ll record his sessions in OT and speech, then give copies to his Nursery teachers and Kathy, aiding the Notebook. It will also be useful for his grandparents and yaya since we can’t all fit in the room during sessions plus it serves as documentation.

Let’s see how this goes. Pray for us!